A Guide for Christians Who Lose Unbelieving Loved Ones

Image Credit: Media from Wix

If you are a believer and follower of Jesus Christ, as the Holy Spirit reveals Him in the Bible, then you will suffer two kinds of death-related grief in your life: 1) the loss of loved ones who are fellow Christians and 2) the loss of loved ones who are unbelievers.

When you lose a loved one who is a fellow believer, you have to deal with the hole in your heart left by that person's loss the rest of your life, but the hope of reunion with them in the presence of Christ can make that loss bearable and overcomable, because you know it's a void that, though painful, will be more than filled up again when you're with the Lord.

But, when you lose a loved one who didn't put their trust in Jesus, it can feel like a pain with no remedy. Because not only does that person's loss leave a hole in your heart that will always be with you on this side of eternity, but you'll never see that person again for all eternity. Because you are an eternal lover of Jesus and that person will be an everlasting enemy of Christ. So how can that grief possibly be bearable, let alone overcomable?!

Well, I do think there is a way, and I'll attempt to describe it here in this guide. And I recommend writing your answers in response to the directions on this guide because of the therapeutic value of writing things down.

1) Think as deeply as you can about the characteristics of your lost loved one that made you love them! Note all those specific characteristics! Since I'm assuming my readers here are Christians, I'm also assuming these characteristics are good by Biblical standards.

2) Think deeply on how all those good characteristics are intrinsically, originally, perfectly, and infinitely in God! Indeed, these attributes are what makes God God. And what you lose in the death of a finite creature you gain infinitefold in the infinite God who is yours' through your trust in Him!

3) Think deeply on how all the other children of God, your family in His Son by His Spirit, have God's likeness similar to how you have the likeness of your human parents! What you lose in the deaths of your unbelieving loved ones you gain through a countless multitude of believing loved ones!

4) Remind yourself how, in eternity, you will enjoy your infinite God and a numberless amount of godly people and that God will FULLY wipe away ALL your sorrows (Revelation 21:4)!

And one final note: this guide is only to enable you to comfort yourself about unbelieving loved ones you've lost to death, who are permanently entrenched in their hatred for God and are suffering permanent punishment for their rebellion against God. DON'T let this lull you into neglecting to share the Gospel with your unbelieving loved ones whom God is currently keeping alive, because they still have a chance to be saved, receive eternal life, and become members of your spiritual family in Christ! Take this guide and use it to heal your sorrow over your dead lost loved ones and to inspire you to share the Gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ with your living lost loved ones, Biblically persuading them with all your heart, if they will listen to you (Matthew 7:6), to have a change of mind (which is the essence of repentance) that leads to them taking away their trust from whatever they are currently placing it in and putting it in the Lord Jesus Christ, and Him alone!

Godspeed, Christian reader!!!